Shannon Ball Yoga

Practice practice practice or adult spirituality

2011-06-06T10:10:00.000-07:00

Wow, I am touched and thrilled as I read Christina Sell's (http://christinasell.blogspot.com/) newest book, My Body is a Temple. I picked this book up right when I needed it.

I have been hitting a wall I know very well in my spiritual practice. This wall effects EVERY aspect of my life and creates a familiar drama. I have wept and felt totally helpless around my practices.

Here's what happens: I get really excited about dedicating myself to some practice that Life is calling me to, I do it with zeal, make plans, have expectations for immediate change in my life (kinda like I used to with diets) and then, after about a week to 10 days I get depressed, let down, feel rejected by the Universe and obstinant about how I am different and it just doesn't work for me! Then my little drama that is playing in my head can be true: Once again, I am a victim. Once again, something is wrong with me. Once again, I knew the Universe didn't really have my back.

So, here is the part I keep forgetting: The discipline of practice, prayer, yoga asana, reading, meditation, etc., isn't about me getting the life I think I should get. My fantasy of a nirvana is so limited and adolescent. It is about no longer feeling the pain or whatever sensation I feel when I don't get EXACTLY what I want how I want it when I want it.

Practice is about aligning, again and again, with the Highest. As Christina says, "cultivating a state of remembrance: that our personal efforts are gestures of affirmation to help us experience ourselves as part of a larger spiritual flow" (7). Christina calls it the art of devotion, discipleship and conscious living.

For so long my view has been about changing me so I could finally make it in this world. I learned that I had to make me comfortable and it never occurred to me that my idea of comfortable wasn't always (or even often) that productive, healthy or life-affirming. I am reminded of what Paul Muller-Ortega calls,"adult spirituality". As an adult I get to choose what and whom I align with at every level: thought, word, deed, etc.. It is up to me to decide how I want to live and where I lasso my mind and choices/actions in to stay aligned with that which I hold as the HIGHEST.

This is so cool. Who knew? We really do have everything we need right inside us. The place where the Light lives. I get to choose to remember.

Go get the book people! I bet you can get it at C's site as well as Hohm press, amazon, anusara.com. Love shan

Perfect Love

2011-05-18T01:22:00.000-07:00

Spring

Somewhere
a black bear
has just risen from sleep
and is staring

down the mountain.
All night
in the brisk and shallow restlessness
of early spring

I think of her,
her four black fists
flicking the gravel,
her tongue

like a red fire
touching the grass,
the cold water.
There is only one question:

how to love this world.
I think of her
rising
like a black and leafy ledge

to sharpen her claws against
the silence
of the trees.
Whatever else

my life is
with its poems
and its music
and its cities,

it is also this dazzling darkness
coming
down the mountain,
breathing and tasting;

all day I think of her –
her white teeth,
her wordlessness,
her perfect love.

~ Mary Oliver ~

(House of Light)

Present Moment and Traffic Court

2011-05-09T18:09:00.000-07:00

My longing for you
keeps me
in this moment
My passion
gives me courage
-Mevlana Rumi (1207 - 1273)

Today I went to traffic court to deal with a speeding ticket I got on my way to Asheville earlier this year. As often seems to be the case, Life has artfully arranged a way for me to see how I am living out of the present moment. I was contemplating why I got the ticket and how my mom and husband are often fearful when they drive with me. That is kind of embarrassing to admit, but hey, it is all in the truth right?
So why do I drive the way I do? I was talking to one of my teachers and she asked me if I was driving like there was no one else on the road. Yes! This is such a theme for me: it is all about me, I am in a hurry, I need to get my needs met now, I need to be heard now, etc. I was struck by how this blots out the sunlight of the Spirit.
There is so much good in this life. One of the ways I survived the craziness of my family when I was growing up was to try to control everything. If Life would just do what It was supposed to then I would be happy. If I could distract myself enough, stay busy enough, I wouldn't have to feel some unpleasant and scary feelings.
Now this system is outdated. I find that I feel distressed, disconnected and antsy when I am rushing around. I want to drink Life in.

"We whack away at the gorgeousness of reality with too many distractions."-Theo Gund

Here are some ways that I am working with staying in the experience of each moment:
-smelling the air outside
-breathing with conscious awareness and, when I notice I am stressed or thinking I need to hurry, remembering that this is just an old habitual pattern and I can slow down and breath. Everything will be fine.
-drive with great attention and patience
-remember gratitude. there is so much sweetness in my life. I want to remember this and utter a whisper of thanks again and again throughout my day.

Knowing Love

2011-04-07T18:05:00.000-07:00

I have been aware for awhile now that the people I most admire, the one's that are living life in a way that I want to emulate, are people who pursue and nourish a relationship with Divine Self and a God of their understanding. There is not a time I can remember that I have not yearned for God. Not a time that I have not wanted to lean into and on the Great Love. As a little person circumstances taught me that it was much safer to rely on myself and my own best thinking. This worked really well too. However, as I became older, this thinking became the source of much suffering in my life.

I guess for me (I always have this story that this doesn't happen to you folks . . . whoever "you" are) this will a the place where there is a good bit of fluctuation: my willingness to lean into Love.

When I type this I feel embarrassed. Like, who wouldn't want to lean on Love? Well, I need a lot of reminding. Every morning I ask God to help me see Him/Her. Then I hear the birds singing and my sweet puppies shake their little bottoms and my cat cries for more food and I remember that there must be a great Love that holds us.

So, here is my work. May, I be willing to set myself into the hands of the One that I may not always be able to see in the ways I think I should be able to. May my thinking be cleared so that I realize that I don't even know how I think God should look, I just know that I have a lot of fear and doubt.

Finally,I want to share a small bit from Bill Mahoney's new work, "Exquisite Love" (available at anusara.com--run don't walk folks). I pranam at Mr. Mahoney's feet for his faith and his work because it has spoken to my heart so profoundly.

"When I reflect on this song of creation, I sometimes picture in my mind a vast unbounded ocean of undifferetiated Consciousness. It is an ocean of pure life. Then, a pulse--Love Itself--moves within this infinite field of potential. Rays of love spread outward from this center, taking countless different forms as individual waves rise into existence, each refracting the light of Consciousness in their own particular ways and conditioned by various forces. The One becomes the Many, all of which also hold within them the essence of the One. You and I are instances of such waves in this ocean of Consciousness, at the center of which is Love".

p.5

Ross Rayburn and loving you

2011-03-28T19:19:00.001-07:00

Okay, so cutie-pie and Certified Anusara Instructor, Ross Rayburn does not know me from Adam. However, if you have seen him then the title of this entry caught your interest. No, really, not only is he a doll, but he is a humble, gifted, wise teacher in the Anusara tradition.

Believe it or not I am not writing this post about Ross. I mostly just thought I was being funny AND I am inspired by something he said AND my last post (August, 2010, but who's counting) was inspired by him as well.

Here's the real thing I am writing about today. This was inspired by Olga Rasmussen's entry on something Ross said in a workshop she attended:

"Are you maintaining your relationship to your goodness in every thought word, and deed? This is the whole ball of wax in yoga! And if you do not become a better person through your practice, then do something else. "

And then this beauty:

Immerse yourself in the rapture of music. You know what you love. Go There.tend to each note, each chord,Rising up from silence and dissolving again. Vibrating strings draw usInto the spaciousness of the heart. The body becomes light as the skyAnd you, one with the Great Musician,Who is even now singing usInto existence. Verse 18. The Radiance SutrasVijnana Bhairava Tantra (http://vimalablue.wordpress.com/)

Huh! I don't need to say anything really. YOU! BEAUTIFUL YOU.

"You, ONE with the GREAT MUSICIAN"

May we be soft and sweet as we tend to each note of us, each note of our lives y'all.

This is yoga.

The triadic adventure

2010-08-08T18:06:00.000-07:00

Today I was blessed to be able to attend Ross Rayburn's practice in Atlanta (thanks so much to Gina for hosting him!). I love how the universe conspires to help us awaken . . . this was exactly what I needed.

So, Ross said his theme for this year was the Triadic Adventure. He spoke about how important it was for us to remember that to everything there is a beginning, a middle and an end. This was so potent for me because lately I have been jumping to the end (which is completely imagined by me I might add) instead of being with what is.

I love Anusara because its principles are so beautifully relative to living a good life while accepting Life on Life's terms. Ross spoke to how we can learn to skillfully align with the Bigger energy in order to manifest the life we desire.

So he used the three goddesses, Kali (darkness, "the rumbling of beginnings and the chopping up of our expactations" as Ross said); Saraswati (goddess of orderliness)and
Laksmi (the goddess of beautiful expression) to demonstrate how to skillfully align with the Supreme Energy.

He said that first we must always soften and let go of our limited ideas and expectations. Next, after we have become still and settled we must create order, we must think about what our choices are, what the highest action would be to take--instead of simply reacting to what Life has placed in our paths. Finally, after aligning with the Higher Intellegence, we come into the beautiful whoosh part of the wave. That innate beauty that is able to express itself fully and freely.

Ross's message was so powerful for me as he reminded us that if we are too busy dwelling in the end, trying to get to the Laksmi (or beautiful part) of the experience then we actually miss the Light. We are so busy trying to get to the beauty, get to the Light, that we miss it completely. He said we must be willing to start at the beginning. In the darkness, or Kali, in order to really see the Light.

Let me insert a personal note here (well, I guess this is all my personal note, but you know what I mean . . .) and say that I have been so caught up in the drama and seeming whirlwind of some rather challenging and stressful personal circumstances that I have turned on my iron grip to try to "handle" (i.e. control) everything. Now, intellectually, and in times of less stress, I gleefully remember that when I am clinging and grasping to something I block the Sunlight of the Spirit. When I am scared or feel threatened however, I often throw all that out the window and move into fight or flight mode as fast as I can.

This week I am going to work with getting settled. First settle, and then, big ole' heart softening. Then, pray, skillfully align with the wisdom within. Make room for the Light. Make space so the Light is not blocked.

This should keep me busy.

Unfolding to Grace

2010-06-22T05:29:00.000-07:00

Grace was not a theory that was taught in my home when I was growing up. I think my family mythology was that there was not a such thing as abundance or Divine help. Goodness that flowed in our own hearts and all around us as a real force that we could tap into was just not an option in the Frank household. I always think it so wonderful, so heartening when I see my friends raising their children with hope, with the notion that there are endless possibilities and they have support to try them out. The first way we learn about Grace is from our parents and how they relate to the world. We all know this can be wonderful or, not so wonderful :-) I digress.

Grace is defined as, "the unmerited love and favor of God toward mankind; divine influence acting in a person to make the person pure, morally strong; a special virtue, gift, or help given to a person by God". (dictionary.com)

The 1st principle of Anusara yoga is "Open to Grace". This principle reminds us that before we exert any effort, make any plans, move a muscle we are to soften and open to the bigger flow. We remember God 1st, we surrender, we remember there is help, and then we move forward. So cool, huh?

"Know that Grace has the power
to transform everything you aspire to,
so aspire to the highest
and offer yourself to Grace."
~ John Friend

Opening to Grace means we become available to the flow of our lives and we know and consciously tap into the force of goodness that is ALWAYS there supporting us. This flow is called Grace.

"Grace will hold you
every step of the way."
~ John Friend

Olga Rasmussen says that Opening to Grace means, "saying yes to the whole river of life in all its permutations . . . . "

It is my prayer and my deep (and often challenging) work at this point in my life to hold the discipline of practicing connecting with the God of my understanding and surrendering at the beginning of every day. When I do not do this I feel disconnected, not as clear, and eventually I begin to wonder why I do not feel as, "in the flow". Well, it is because I have walked away from it.

Grace offers gerself to us boundlessly. May each of us walk into her arms.

I will be teaching a 2 hour class this Saturday, June 26th, on the 1st principle of Anusara, "Opening to Grace", 8 a.m.-10 a.m. Class will be all levels.
www.athensfivepointsyoga.com

Into our hearts

2010-06-17T04:42:00.000-07:00

What a lovely morning it is here in Athens, GA. The birdies are busily chatting away and the tremendous storm seemed to blow away some of the heat . . . at least for the moment.
Speaking of tremendous, I am feeling tremendously inspired as of late. Thank God. It is a much welcomed reprieve after many months of feeling disconnected and less than inspired. The lovely Christina Sell graced Athens this past weekend and that just helped to fuel my fire. I learned so much and my body feels challenged and open. Yum.

Lately I have been pondering the glorious possibility that it is through the body that we come to our hearts. Christina has a quote from Douglas Brooks on her blog(May 9, 2010), "If you want to lay claim to your whirling mind you have to lay claim to your body". Coming from a family and, I believe, largely cultural, belief that the body is just to be shaped and controlled to make us more "presentable", more "worthy", I am so heartened to hear talk such as this. It has certainly been my experience that my body and my relationship with it is one of my greatest teachers.

I have been reading this blog, "Out of the Blue". The logger describes the awesome potential for healing and moving more deeply into the heart of who we truly are:

The blogger is speaking of asking Annamalai Swami a question:

"As a young lustful yogi I had the termerity to ask him what remains to be done for realisation. Through his radiant translator, Sundarum, he said simply “Pay attention to your vasanas.” I replied “Duh. What’s a vasana?” “Tendencies of the mind. ” This is the most simple and the most difficult of advice, and has entwined me in a lifetime of sadhana.

So vasanas are tendencies of the personality, what makes me particularly quirky and distinct, is what produces the habitual modes of action, that makes me do what I do in spite of myself. Feuerstein describes them thus, ” If we liken the psyche to soft wax, vasanas are the karmic imprints left behind by our psychic activities. Vasanas are chains of similar karmic activators (samskaras), deposited in the depths of the mind through actions and volition. They must be dissolved before enlightenment can be attained.” (2001:460).

And this leads me onto Anusara yoga, to my little sacroiliac lila of late, kleshas and the pathway into union with the Divine.

A major key that unlocked why yoga is an essential part of sadhana, which took me a long time to understand was seeing how the afflictions or kleshas operate. I have a natal sun square pluto which means I am particularly well endowed with affliction. Thankyou Divine. i.e. Periodic meltdown and radical transformation, like it or not, and let me tell you, mostly I do not. I am brought to my knees regularly and still I do not see.

So to embody the blessings of practice, is to unlock this contracted energy, this resistance to life. In yogic terms the vasanas and its associated trauma penetrates deeper than the organs and tissues. This energy of these vasanas are hanging out in the pranamayakosha, or the subtle energy body. Yoga philosophy speaks of five afflictions that keep us bound to reality. Ignorance, I-ness, craving, aversion, clinging to life and fear of death. The energy of these afflictions collapse in on themselves like a dying star, or a black hole and are embedded in the subtle energy body. They reflect in the mirror of the physical body. Until these energy cysts are treated the structure and function of the tissues will continue to reflect them. Svoboda says vasanas can be inherited from ones ancestors, or perchance a past life. Regardless they seem to be largely there when we are born. Bummer. They clearly show up as my cramp.

Yoga unwinds these patterns. Sadhana unwinds these vasanas. This is why yoga makes me feel so peaceful, so sane. And why Anusara reveals the body of Light, and a possibility greater than myself. How practice dissolves these “subliminal activators” that keeps us having bad hair days. Sadhana then is the path of peace, the path of heart. The only choice …"

“Be strong then and enter into your own body.
There you have a solid place for your feet.
Think about it carefully
Don’t go off somewhere else.
Kabir says this.
just throw away all thoughts of imaginary things.
And stand firm in that which you are.” Kabir

May I accept the offerings of Truth my body offers so generously. Happy weekend!

Gratitude

2010-06-02T19:06:00.000-07:00

So today started beautifully. I had a very inspired practice at the studio and even got in touch with some uncomfortable feelings that had been lurking around in the ethers of my body/mind. It was quite wonderful actually as I was able to sit with the feelings and process them out instead of stuffing them back down. Due to this, and the wonderful students at class today, I had a delicious time teaching my 9.30 a.m. class. I felt clear and connected.

Later, stuff just didn't quite go exactly as I wanted it to. I began harboring some resentments (or some old ones re-surfaced) and then I began to think I was not good enough. The old, "if only I was "blank", then I would be happy" routine. Uggh. No no no fun.

So, I called a friend and she listened sweetly. We talked about possibilities for where the anger was coming from and what needed to happen so I could clear that "stuff" up. She also suggested that I consider a gratitude list. Honestly it is hilarious how strongly I will resist practices like this when I am "in a funk". I was like, "okay, I am miserable feeling like this, but do I REALLY want to let go? do I really want to try another way?" Sometimes folks,I just like to bitch.

So, knowing that this is not truly who I am, or all that I want to embrace I have decided to try a gratitude list for today. Here goes:
1. I have a wonderful partner in my husband
2. It poured rain today-I love big thunder/rain storms
3. I have plenty to eat/drink and shelter.
4. I am doing the job of my heart's dream (yoga!)
5. I have two of the best puppies
6. I am healthy
7. I have tons of loving support from people who want to see the real me (hubbie, friends, family)
Honestly, now I am thinking I could go on and on. I don't want to bore you, but do want to invite you to join me in Opening to the Grace in our lives. I feel better already. What are you grateful for today?

Two reminders:
-Group practice at 5 Points Yoga (www.athensfivepointsyoga), 5-7 p.m., Saturday, June 5th
-Christina Sell!!!! 5 Points Yoga, June 11-13

Finally, this lovely quote is from Olga Rasmussen's insights on her blog:

"Peace is found in surrender to good through devotion. People who are loving, who practice stillness, who delight in meditation and good actions are really peaceful. Peace is the altar of God, the conditions in which happiness exists...

Live each present moment completely and the future will take care of itself. Fully enjoy the wonder and beauty of each instant. Practice the presence of peace. The more you do that, the more you will feel the presence of that power in your life..."
-Paramahansa Yogananda

When you day does not go as planned - and even when it does - practice peace!

Posted by Olga Rasmussen on her lovely blog: aligningwithgrace.blogspot.com

discipline

2010-05-25T02:54:00.000-07:00

My life has been so full of "growth opportunities" lately that I have not felt that I could translate my thoughts and experiences into blog world. I so admire the simple, eloquent and honest manner that my favorite blog writers share their truth with (see:Christina Sell, karen Sprute Francovich and Maria Christina).

Suffice it to say that I have been pushed, by the grace of God, to take a real look at if I am truly living what I say I believe. And then, of course, do I really believe what I say I believe? My therapist has told me many times, "Shannon, it is easy to preach spirituality. What is true and simple, but not always so easy, is LIVING and BREATHING what you preach".

Here is what I have come to: I do believe what I say I believe. I fully celebrate the Anusara philosophy as I understand it. I believe that I am intrinsically good, that in my heart lives everything I need to know for bliss in this life. I believe that there is an all powerful Source of everything and that I am deeply and thoroughly connected to Its power and the pulse of all of Life through It. The question for me becomes: am I willing to do what it takes to maintain a conscious contact with this Supreme Intelligence?

Anusara philosophy teaches that each of us, at our core,is expansive, full of bliss and, connected to the One Source of all freedom, all bliss, all Consciousness, all goodness. The Great Pulsing Heart of all hearts. There are certain things in my life, habits of thought and actions, that limit my conscious connection to the One that lives in me. At this point in my life, I feel that I am being called to stand in spiritual discipline (Paul Muller calls this, "adult spirituality"). I think I have had huge rebellion to and suspicion of "discipline". You know, "no one is going to be the boss of me"--sounds real adult huh?

Truth is, in my family, discipline was about a child being bad. I didn't receive a positive picture or example of discipline. Now talk to me about disciplining myself from a place of fear and I can show you one disciplined lady. I have definitely lived self-discipline, just not in the name of love, not around aligning with a benvolent higher power and with my own heart.

I came across a post today in Olga Rasmussen's, "Aligning with Grace" blog (she's another AMAZING blogger/teacher:-)) in her notes from the certified gathering with John Friend:

"Grace is the yogic discipline of remembering"-Bill Mahoney, Tantric Scholar, Davidson

For the vision of my heart to flourish, for my relationship with myself to continue to grow in fondness and intimacy, for me to continue to step into my power and who I truly am, I must now move more fully into Adult Spirituality Land. Discipline in this sense isn't about being punished or controlled or told that there is one way I must believe in order to be "right" or loved. It is not about being able to see God if I jump through hoops that make me pure, etc. Discipline is what Christina Sell wrote so beautifully about in her blog: it is the purposeful binding of one's self to the Light.

And there is a discipline here. It means I make certain choices about how I live because I know what best serves my coming closer to the Light and what takes me further away.

"God doesn't fulfill our desires-this is the view of those still trapped by limited understanding-rather God is our highest and most sublime desire."
Douglas Brooks,Poised for Grace

Awakening

2010-03-24T05:58:00.000-07:00

“Don’t ask yourself what the world needs. Ask yourself what makes you come alive and then go do that. Because what the world needs is people who have come alive.” Dr. Howard Thu

Everything in the universe conspires to help us awaken. I know John has said this, Paul Muller-Ortega has certainly said this (he, in fact, says, "the shakti will burn that which is no longer of service to you").

It is vitally important for me to remember this when difficult times arise. Lately I have been dealing with some internal stuff that has really challenged me. It is easy to just be down. Not that feeling crappy is bad . . . what I mean is that when I do feel down I tend to turn to stories like, "I am always going to be down" and, "there was never a time when I was happy," and, "I am different than other people" on and on. yes, this is anava mala healthy and well in my life.

Anyway, I have been studying the 5 acts of Shiva for a series of classes that I am going to teach on the 5 acts of Shiva :-) and I am remembering why myth and symbols are so vitally important. Like Douglas Brooks says, "these stories remind us, help us know, the deep complexities that live within us".

I sooooo easily forget that for something new to be born, for creation to continue occurring, the entire life cycle must circle its way through Life. The stuff that I am dealing with is uncomfortable, yes, but it is the dying, the threshing of that which is no longer necessary in my life. That which gets in the way of the new.

Wow, Anyway, this gives me so much hope. Reminds me of what joy and provision there is in the great cycle. On Namah Shiva!

I will publish my 5 Acts of Shiva dates soon!!!! Hope my students can get out of bed for it . . . you know who you are . . .

John Friend on how to get lucky

2010-03-15T06:43:00.000-07:00

Barritt, Mary Virginia and I went to Columbia, SC to see John Friend. Wow! He never fails to inspire and refresh me. On Saturday John talked about how to get lucky. Hee Hee. Really, he did. Here's how:

First, John reminded us that when we are in alinment with the great Maha (great)Sakti (the active manifest power that creates the world) or Nature or God (really, whatever it is that is the One to you)then great things happen. That which appears to be random, in fact, is not.

Okay, getting lucky:

1. Be completely open to what is. Perceive the situation as a beginner.

Remember that Supreme Intelligence is intrinsically good. It pulses in everything in the Universe.

John said that because of Source's intrinsic goodness, if we are suffering we have to look at how we are aligning with Nature. It (the One) is not random, It is orderly and intrinsically good.

I have to add a personal side note here. When I first came to Anusara I got really triggered because I interpretted this philosphy to be saying that life is only good like there is not any pain, suffering, etc. What I have come to understand is this: EVERYTHING and EVERYONE is ultimately born of the One. The One is all goodness, all bliss, all light. At our core we are all good. We can,however, choose to align with darkness. Some of us more than others. We all do this. We belittle ourselves, we are cruel to someone, we ingest substances that harm us, we shut down our feelings. Then there are the big ones like murderers, etc. Darkness is part of life. Bliss at the core of all things does not mean there is not Life on Life's terms. There is no magic Anusara pill that makes everything, "okay". We can begin to understand that there is a Great Power that is ALWAYS present under EVERY circumstance and we can choose to align (and re-align, etc) with IT. We can remember that this Power is in us, is flowing through us as us. This helps me to remember that I can be with all my feelings. That none are to be poo-pooed or pushed down. If I try to push the feelings I don't want to feel down the Great order just helps them come into my life again and again :-) so I can grow and continue to awaken.

Okay, back to getting Lucky!

2. Application of knowledge

John said, "luck= L:living U: under C: correct K:knowledge"

3. You actually have to do it and work your hardest

We do have to show up. It's like if you want to get better at a pose:

1st, be open like a little kid. Have you noticed (do you remember in your own body?) how kids are so excited to see what they can do? They rarely (unless they have been taught that they are not enough) doubt their body's ability to play. Why can't we move back into this brilliance as we approach life?
Om Namah Shivayah: I open to my goodness

2nd, we apply the principles of Alignment. First, go back to step one. I am open ALL the possibilities (A.k.a. I am open to my head touching my foot in eka pada rajakapotasana)

3rd, I have to practice the pose in order for it to happen! I show up on my mat and work hard. I pratice, I get help, I listen. It will not fall from the sky . . . there is work, feeling and practice.

Finally, John reminded us that we cannot control the Mystery. We can be in line with It. As soon as I think I know I narrow the possibilities.

May you enjoy this shimmering day.

The heart is the hub

2010-03-02T03:58:00.000-08:00

Hello! It has been so long since I have posted and lately I have found myself timid about posting because I have waited so long. Ahh, but here I am. Life has offered me some painful experiences lately and processing those has taken a great deal of time and energy.

My pattern during times of challenging emotion is to look anywhere and everywhere but within. I have spent a great deal of time, money and effort in my life to try to escape myself and my feelings. Through personal work, the Grace of the Universe placing a spiritual path before me that speaks to my heart, the support of like-minded friends, family, my dear husband Steve and the practice of yoga I return again and again (sometimes begrudgingly) to the altar of my heart.

It seems to be the way of us mortals/Americans. The tantalizing call of what lies "out there". Surely rest comes in some outside, made up, futuristic ideal. My dear friends and I were talking this weekend about how often we live in pursuit of the next idea/thing that will make us safe and happy when the truth is that our lives are full, abundant and beautiful right now.

So, all of this to say that the path in my own life always leads to the doorstep of my own heart. THIS is the unchanging residence of the One that is always with me (and you). There is NO WHERE out there that will lend me the everlasting companionship of my own heart. When Swami Muktananda said, The heart if the hub of all of consciousness" he was not playing around. The guy was on to something. He told us, "to go there", "to ROAM there".

Sometimes I try to buck up and try my old ideals out. Dang, all they cause is pain. The answer is here.

My friend Suzanne reminds me there is no "right" time to meditate. Be with yourself for 5 minutes. Just do it. Life continues and the One is with you right now. Much love.

We will be practicing LOVE filled backbends in class tonight at 6 p.m.(5 points Yoga). Hope to see you there.

The lesson which life repeats and constantly enforces is "look under foot." You are always nearer the divine and the true sources of your power than you think. The lure of the distant and the difficult is deceptive. The great opportunity is where you are. Do not despise your own place and hour. Every place is under the stars, every place is the center of the world.
- John Burroughs

Muscle Energy and the core's longing

2010-01-21T07:08:00.000-08:00

It's Thursday and Steve and I are in the lovely town of Chapel Hill, NC. Steve is attending a Yin yoga training with Sarah Powers and I am, well, enjoying the heck out of unadulterated free time. Before I tell you the thrilling activities I am taking part in I want to state that it is so lovely to watch my partner (and husband!) find and follow his spiritual path. Before I dated Steve I made a list of must-haves in a partner. At the top of this list was that he be actively developing himself spiritually and emotionally . . . . that, whatever his spiritual path was, it be one he followed with commitment and zeal. It is amazing how the intentions of our hearts are heard and I am ever grateful and in awe of the satisfaction and delight it brings me to be with a partner that listens and follows his heart's and soul's yearnings.
Quickly, I went to Paul Sobin's class this morning and it was SO fun. He and his wife Sommer (who is a full 9 mos. pregnant and will deliver any minute now) are both certified Anusara teachers and hold Immersions and Teacher Trainings (thousandpetalsyoga.com). This was a level 2 practice class so Paul practiced with us. I love practice classes as they inspire and delight me to no end. I also, as quite a talker and social butterfly, like the casual and encouraging atmosphere cultivated in a practice. It is always great to see how my teacher practices . . . I ALWAYS learn so much. Today we did scorpian handstand, a pose I have never done. I love how the Universal Principles of Alignement (UPAs) are always opening and revealing a new way for my body to feel, express, open and harness energy.

It is my intention to write about the 5 Universal Principles of Alignment. Mainly for the Athens, GA gang. I find that as we grow as a group of Anusara students, there are many people who really dig the practice and would like to study the alignment principles but may not know all 5 principles or understand them. First, this is an ongoing process (which is part of the delight) that is ever-unfolding and revealing itself to each of us in varied detail. Second, I cannot recommend an Immersion enough if you would really like to be a student of the Anusara principles in greater detail. Ask me if you'd like some direction on Immersions.

So, today is the 2nd UPA, Muscle Energy. (My last post was the 1st UPA, Open to Grace)
Muscle Energy's emphasis, as stated in the Anusara Teacher Training Manual, "is to draw all the parts into one whole with the attitude of self-embracing".
John Friend talks about Muscle Energy as "not merely moving from periphery to core (as it does), but as the core, in its longing to know itself, drawing all of the parts of the self to it". (from the amazing blog:yoganerd.blogspot.com)

The UPAs are so cool because they are an elegant system of taking care of ourselves. Honoring and remembering the Spirit that shines within us. Anusara suggests that God created us out of a yearning to know Itself. Likewise, we have the opportunity to know ourselves more fully (and this helps us know Creator more-it just rolls like that) :-) We must hug to the principles that we know to be true. By remembering this longing to know our fullness more we express our unique hearts and this is a beautiful gift and service to the entire Universe. Okay, I feel myself climbing onto the proverbial pulpit, but I just have to say this: Don't give up! Keep hugging in. This is where it is at . . . YOU, beautiful you.

The following is straight from the ATTM:

Muscle Energy has three main directions of flow which occur in the following sequence:
1. Hugging the core evenly on all sides. Specifically ME flows from the outer circumference to the core lines of the body. The energy flow is from skin to muscle. Ex: Hug your skin evenly on all sides around the muscles of your legs.

2.Drawing the arms, legs, and neck toward the midline or medial core of the body. In whatever initial position the appendages are in, they are isometrically drawn toward the midline via the shortest possible route. Ex: "shins in": hug your shins isometrically towards the midline of your body

3. Drawing from the extremities of the hands, feet and head into the Focal Point of the pose. Ex: From your fingertips, draw the head of your arm bone into your shoudler socket.

Opening to Grace everywhere

2010-01-18T03:28:00.000-08:00

Dictionary.com defines grace as, "the freely given, unmerited favor and Love of God."
Honestly, need I go on from here? How awesome is that? You know, I was not raised in a family that taught Grace. I do not think either of my parents knew Grace for themselves and, although they did the best they could, they certainly did not pass on the notion that Grace both existed, flowed all around us, through us, even as us. The knowledge that Grace is something very real that we can actually invoke and tap into was not taught in the Frank household.

So, here are some ways I am looking at opening to Grace in my daily life as based on the Anusara Universal Principles of Alignment:
-PAUSE and soften-become sensitive to what I am feeling, sensing, hearing before speaking or acting
-REMEMBER the One that has my back-that has all our backs. As I heard Anusara teacher, Elena Brower say recently, "Move into my back body before I say something."
-Expand from the inside. Connect to the bigger energy and remember my own worthiness.
-As John Friend says, "Firmly step into the currents of grace with a solid foundation and a heart open to the infinite possibilities."
-Smile
-Remember the highest intention of my heart

Aren't these wonderful? What if we moved from this place always, everywhere? We can begin this practice NOW. Anusara invites us to practice this in each asana and we can continue off the mat.

Finally, a quote on the beginnings of Anusara:

"Understanding how Friend came up with Anusara Yoga (a-nu-sar-a) is a little like dipping your toe into the very deep well of Tantric philosophy. The name comes from the Sanskrit anu- the process of being in and sara -the flow, which is taken from a verse in the 1000-year-old Kularnava Tantra: "Shakti-nipata-anusarena sishyo'anugraham-arhati". UUUS-based Tantric scholar, Dr. Douglas Brooks, translates this as "Flowing with Grace (anusarena) we experience our inner worth, we align our bodies, our minds and hearts in the current of the Divine flowing through us, we celebrate life itself as we touch the Divinity who pulsates within us as our every thought, feeling, and experience." (http://www.omshop.com/Anusara/JohnFriend/tabid/131/Default.aspx)

LSD and a blade of grass

2010-01-12T04:39:00.001-08:00

Did this catch your attention? :-) Oh, I have not posted in 11 days, I just haven't had the words. Now I do. I will try not to go too long.
So, Saturday Steve and I were driving to ATL to do a workshop with Martin Kirk. Martin is an amazing Anusara Yoga® instructor (http://www.kirkyoga.com/)with a zeal for life, a deep kindness and a gift at making the UPAs (universal principles of alignment) accessible. I was reading the intro of PATHS TO GOD, a book of lectures given by Ram Dass on the Bhagavad Gita (thanks Richard) aloud and it brought up a discussion between Steve and myself about Ram's, Timothy Leary's, etc. use of LSD to try to reach God. BTW, if I haven't mentioned (I feel like I met the biggest movie star), I met Ram while we were in Maui (not like he invited us over for dinner or anything, but still).

I love what Krishna Das said at a Kirtan workshp in ATL last year as he addressed his time using drugs. He said, "yes, I could feel like I was one with a blade of grass so I did get the experience of being one with everything. However, in order to keep that feeling of merging with the One you have to commit suicide because you will inevitable overdose on LSD to keep the feeling going." So, Krishna said he had to come to a way to know his union with the One without the prop of psychotropics.

Let me say now, if you have not seen the movie, "Fierce Grace" you must see it immediately. It is about Ram Dass as a young Harvard prof. along with T. LEary, etc. and their psychotropic experiments. Eventually Ram was led to his teacher Maharaj-ji and the story continues into the time of Dass's stroke. It is a beautiful, heart-opening piece and it was life changing and affirming for me.

Okay, back to the ride. Basically Steve and I were just recounting how the tantra teaches that each of us is a manefestation of the One creative, supreme energy and how do we support that memory in our daily lives without using harmful props like LSD. Can we remember that the One chose, just for It's delight, to pour out in unique expression as everything and everyone? So, everyone you and I encounter today, every kitty cat, every Farmville user, every bank teller, every chirping birdy . . . they are all the One expressing itself . . . dancing the dance of creation.

This is what it is all about.

God comes to us disguised as our lives.
- Paula D'Arcy

A New Year, Dogs and "Invictus"

2010-01-01T04:20:00.000-08:00

This morning our dog, Dori, was happily awake and ready to go at 4.30 a.m.. Her bed is in our room so she just thumps her tail against our bed and puts her face right in ours when she is ready to wake us up. I told her to go back to sleep to no avail. Steve and I both decided to get up.
After stoking the woodstove and feeding the dogs (they returned to their beds directly after eating) we each sat for meditation. I started by remembering all that I have been given this year. I have been working on really feeling and opening my heart to the fullness of Life and all the abundance that has so freely been given to me.
It was a beautiful early morning-bright with the moon. When I took the dogs out I heard an owl blessing our day, "whowho . . . whowho".
I am happy to be moving forward into the Light of a new year.
Yesterday afternoon we saw "Invictus". Do not miss it. It is such an inspiring tale and perfect for the beginning of a new year. The most powerful part of the whole story for me was this: Mandela was jailed for his plans to sabotage the S. African government who continued to oppress blacks. "Mandela - a lawyer by training - told the court earlier: "I do not deny that I planned sabotage. I did not plan it in a spirit of recklessness nor because I have any love of violence. I planned it as a result of a calm and sober assessment of the political situation that had arisen after many years of tyranny, exploitation and oppression of my people by the whites."
http://news.bbc.co.uk/onthisday/hi/dates/stories/june/12/newsid_3006000/3006437.stm
After 27 years of imprisonment in a small cell without even a mattress, afetr 27 years of back breaking quarry work as a prisoner, Mandela maintained a peaceful and forgiving stance. He lived Gandi's famous teaching, "we must be the change we wish to see in the world."

The most potent scene is when Matt Damon's character says, "He was imrisoned for 27 years and came out ready to forgive his oppressors."
This year I want to embody this way of living. Change starts with me. When I am in touch with my own light, when I am embodying the change, I will serve others naturally.

It has come to me through so many messengers, including this movie, that my heart and soul's work is to nurture my own self-knowing. From this place I align with the powerful flow of Grace. I will know where to go, what to do next, how I can best be of service to my fellows.
I leave you with one final Mandela quote:
“As I have said, the first thing is to be honest with yourself. You can never have an impact on society if you have not changed yourself... Great peacemakers are all people of integrity, of honesty, but humility.” Nelson Mandela

Shakti

2009-12-26T17:33:00.000-08:00

"the creative power of the Self that animates the entire universe, seen and unseen."
www.oztantra.com/index.php

"the energy of the Divine that awakens the spiritual potentials of humanity. It is also called the Grace-Bestowing Power of the Divine, descent of the Holy Spirit, Light Immersion, Baraka, or Shaktipat."
www.mudrashram.com/glossarypage.html

"Shakti is the feminie aspect of divinity. Shakti is the life giving force essential for procreation."
hinduism.suite101.com/article.cfm/glossary_q_to_s

The shakti is the feminine face of God. In Hindu lore she is the consort of Siva (the masculine face on God). She is the manifestation of creative energy.

So, yesterday Steve and I took our dog Dori on a walk through the trails near our home. I was telling Steve how these walks are one of my favorite things to do with him. The trails in our neighborhood feel like we are far away in the mountains and I immediately notice myself become more grounded when I walk them.

Dori is so delghtful on these walks. She has that little nose to the ground and she is so excited she can barely keep from galloping away. You can just see her little body light up. It brings me so much joy.

You may be wondering why I began this with Shakti definitions . . .
Well, Steve and I were talking about how fun she is to watch and Steve says, "she is so full of Shakti." So simple, but so profound: she is totally aligned at that moment and she just glows (yes, even through her gorgeous black fur). We talked about how we were naturally delighted in her because she is aligned with the One. When anyone is aligned with the One, they are in the Shakti. We are intrinsically drawn to the beauty of this Essence. That is what we were seeing in Dori. This is why we all delight in babies, in our pets, in the bird's song.

So, may I remember how effortlessly, how joyfully she sets about her life. She steps right into the Flow without question, without doubt. She KNOWS IT is always there.

Wednesday, December 23rd and flamingos

2009-12-23T08:33:00.000-08:00

So today is our travel day from Hawaii. Steve and I have spent a glorious 10 days reveling in the lush, exquisite beauty here and enjoying one another's company. This morning we drank coffee and watched some flamingos unfold into a new day. (As a side note . . . I don't know that flamingos even belong in Hawaii but we are spending our last night in a Disneylandish hotel that has a beautiful outdoor water feature with, sadly, lots of contained wildlife). These flamingos began to wake up and unfurl their delicate necks. Then, I swear, they were playing like my dogs do . . . kinda nipping at one another, provoking one another to engage in play. One stretched it's magnificent wings and displayed a deeper, more provocative pink. I thought to myself how God's glory never ceases to reveal itself. I could go on and on about the beauty of their knobby knees and their sweet pink webbed feet . . .
Whoever invented those plastic flamingos seriously missed the mark. But, I digress . . .

I had the honor of attending several Anusara classes with the powerful and profound teacher, Skeeter Tichnor. Skeeter so eloquently reminded us that the guru lives inside us. As an extrovert I managed life by turning outwards to survive. This worked, in many ways, for a long time. No longer, Don't get me wrong. I will always be an extrovert and I LOVE people and being social. However, it is in my center that strength resides. As the sage Bhagavan Nityananda said, "The heart is the hub of all of sacred places; go there and roam."

We had the pleasure of attending an event with Saul David Rae and friends, Sri Sakti Activation in Haiku. It was a night of praising the divine mother through puja, kirtan, dance. It was lovely and a definite high point for Steve and myself. There was a time of offering intention and it came very clearly to me that my work this year is in supporting myself in the deepening of my relationship with my own heart and the power that resides within.

Winter Solstice marks the 12 days of Light as we journey towards Epiphany. In the Christian tradition this is marked by the birth of the Christ child. In the Pagan tradition this is celebrated by the coming of the Light within and without.

No matter what tradition we celebrate, we have the honor of being able to reflect on this past year during these 12 days. This is also the time of cultivating our heart's work for the New Year.

May we be sensitive and open to the epiphanies that are always opening to us and may we be open to seeing and embodying them.

Remember, New Year's Day practice and intention setting at 5 Points Yoga with me. WWW.athensfivepointsyoga.com to register, 10 a.m.-noon

Thursday, 12/10

2009-12-09T17:56:00.000-08:00

Today is my beloved, Steve's, birthday. After attending the class I usually teach at the Y (Henry taught today!) I got a massage from my dear friend Anne. Then we spent the rest of the day celebrating Steve's birthday. Thank God for small favors, Steve went with me to get a pedicure. He let the woman paint his toe nails clear which was a first. We took a hike around the trail that circles our community with Dori (our dog/child)-it was lovely. The trail goes by the river and it is so full and shimmery. We walked down towards the dam to investigate the mysterious mini falls like excited kids.

I loved exploring when I was a little girl. Today in yoga I was committing to the continuation of this adventurous exploration of my inner forests. When I was little this was the most wonderful and exciting prospect in the world--entering unknown landscapes. May each of us continue to grow in the exploration and discovery of our own heart terrain.

I will not be posting again until after Christmas and hope to have some wonderful experiences to share with you from our time in Maui. While we are there we will see Krishna Das at a kirtan and, of course, we will hike, practice yoga and attend an Anusara class or two, play on the beach and relax relax relax! Hopefully we will meet some whales too.

I hope to see you in the New Year's Day practice I will be leading at 5 Points Yoga. Practice will be all levels, 10 a.m.-noon. This special practice is themed, "Setting intention in an abundant world". Join us in a fun, lively practice while we set conscious intention for the birth of this new year.

Remember to breath. Remember your goodness. Holiday love, Shannon

worthiness

2009-12-07T03:53:00.000-08:00

Hello

This beautiful verse from the Radiance Sutras, as translated by Lorin Roche, is what I read from tonight in 6 p.m. class. Thanks to each of you beautiful yogis who attend this class. I feel a strong sense of community and enjoy you so much. We will continue our work on sirsasana 2 and bakasana to sirsasana 2 and back to bakasana.

*See this shining example with Desiree Rumbaugh:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9NSJRl965P4

What fun! Melt your sweet hearts as we journey into holiday season friends.

May each of us continue to allow the lotus petals of our own hearts unfold.

"The One Who is at Play Everywhere says,
There is a space in the heart where everything meets.
Come here if you want to find me.
Mind, senses, soul, eternity - all are here.
Are you here?

Enter the bowl of vastness that is the heart.
Listen to the song that is always resonating.
Give yourself to it with total abandon.

Quiet ecstasy is here -
And a steady, regal sense
Of resting in a perfect spot.

You who are the embodiment of blessing,
Once you know the way,
The nature of attention will call you to return.
Again, and again, answer that call,
And be saturated with knowing,
'I belong here, I am home.'"

on our heart and soul's work-and the Athens rockin' yoga community

2009-12-02T01:11:00.000-08:00

Of the many gifts I have been given in this life, the opportunity to teach and practice yoga is among the best. There was a time in my life when I thought I would never know what I was going to do with my life. That I would never be able to find my heart's true desires. My soul's work.

One of my dear friends, Shea, said, "Shannon, why don't you pray? Ask for help". Well, I wasn't even sure there was anything out there and even if there was I doubted it would help me. I was sure there was something wrong with me and that I was so different from everyone else that I would not hear even if an answer did come my way. But Shea said, "Just fake it 'til you make it . . . act as if you believe". She said, "all you have to be is even the tiniest bit willing and you will receive help".

Despite my abiding sense that I was doomed and different, I did have some willingness in my heart and so I called out to the Universe for help.

Now here's where the miracle happens. It didn't happen in my time necessarily and it didn't look like I thought it would. IT WAS BETTER. In fact, it was perfect for me. It came in the form of yoga. Above all things I desired a way to relate to God and I wanted meaningful direction for my life's work. Yoga came like a sweet kitty cat curled up on my doormat. It was offered to me like a gift for the taking.
I partook (is this a word?) casually. I knew there was something here for me and perhaps that was part of my hesitation. I remember being scared to be that quiet with myself.

My yoga journey began tentatively. It took me a several years to really dive in. Once I gave myself over I was amazed. Then Anusara came my way. In this school of yoga I find that I align so easily with the philosophical, physical and emotional principles. My life feels so rich and full.

Although this is not what I intended to write about I must have needed to. As the New Year approaches and we move towards our celebration of dying to the old and being born into the new may each of us remember the unending hope that is offered to us always. The One is there. Grace flows full and free. All we have to do is be but willing. When we align with the energy amazing things happen.

Now, quickly, I want to shout out to the ever growing Anusara kula (community) in Athens, GA. The other day I was checking people in and I could see into the yoga room. Everyone was chatting and catching up. I feel so happy to see this sweet group supporting themselves and one another through practice and community. I am so excited to continue our growth together.

With joy~

God chose to embody as you

2009-11-22T11:01:00.000-08:00

One of the philosophical teachings of Anusara is that we are intrinsically good. Something in me yearns to believe this. I think it is one of the things that drew me to Anusara as a philosophy. The yoga practice should help the practitioner feel good about him or herself; to see the beauty that shines from within.

The creation story from a tantric perspective (this is VERY simplified)is that God chose to manifest as you and me. We are each purposeful creations of the One so that the One can experience Itself through us. Kinda cool huh? God DELIGHTS in you and me. Right now. Just as we are! Notice there is not anything in there about messing up or not doing "it" right. The tantra teaches that our worthiness is not earned, nor does it have to be repaid or "kept" by certain duties. It just is. Period.

Recently I have become aware of many of my dreams coming true. Often, actually always, these dreams are coming true in a bigger and better way than I could have ever imagined on my own. I am spending time in gratitude for all these gifts and have also noticed this twinge of doubt coming up. It plays something like this: "Ahh, this is just a fluke. Don't get too comfortable." And, to my horror, "You are not really good enough to deserve this. Soon everyone will realize this and "it" will end."

Simply being who we are is of delight to the One who made us. How cool would it be if, instead of trying to be someone, something else that I think I should be, I relished in knowing more fully who I am? If I spent time just knowing myself more fully? It is my belief that by celebrating my intrinsic worth that I am participating in a worshipful activity. If the Divine created me then why would I, how could I, want to diminish myself?

As I write this I see that God has given me my resolution. It is time to know my worth. It is time to stand in my goodness and truly soak up the abundance that Grace offers all of us. Wanna join me?

"Coincidentally" I cam across this sight, soundsoflight.com, and read the following:

You have only to allow yourself to connect to the worth you are, that you may then know all of the infinite ways your value to life truly contributes to the spiritual collective. Believe your worth is infinite just by being who you are, and life will provide you with an abundance of resources, and in that you will know in every way that the physical world has heard your claim that you are a priceless being and you will stand for no less in life than complete and total abundance in every way that will provide complete happiness for you. See the value you are, know it, feel it, believe it.

this precious breath

2009-11-18T17:23:00.001-08:00

My friend's husband lost his best friend last night. I am washed with the tenderness of remembering mortality. My heart hurts for my friend's loss. There is joy here too. For the bitter sweetness that comes with opening my heart and knowing love.

I have been thinking all day about this precious breath that you and I are breathing in and out. We are not guaranteed the next.

Here is my prayer, my invocation, for my life and to honor the life that ended early:
may I soak up each jeweled ray of the sweet moon
may I rejoice at the beguiling scent of the gardenia
may my heart dance with delight as I listen to my fiancee "talk" to our fat cat Mazzy
may I relish, truly drink up all the goodness that abounds in my life-the treasured friends, family, teachers and students that Grace me with their presence.

May I remember to kiss the earth as I bow in gratitude for the gift of this precious breath.

Playin' Big and 2 special birthdays

2009-11-15T05:51:00.000-08:00

First, a big shout out to two of my fav students: Carolyn H and Henry P celebrated birthdays yesterday. What a wonderful year this will be!

Yesterday's, 7.30 a.m., mixed levels class was awesome. It is so exciting to see this group grow! I feel like we are really making progress with the principles of alignment and it shows in the beauty of practice. It is so fun to watch people's practices grow and change. Lia is on the cusp of Adho Mukha Vrksasana (handstand), Eric's hamstrings are opening. So exciting and such a joy to share in the sweetness of connecting with one's Self.

One of the main tenants of the Tantra is that we are all Shiva. God chose to manifest itself as each of us so that he/she could delight in him/herself. How cool is that?!?! I love that each of us is here as an expression of the divine One. The great dance of consciousness is ours to partake in.

We can each rejoice in the beauty of life. We create beauty by consciously choosing to know ourselves more fully.

For many years I was terrified that I would never know what the deepest desires of my heart were. However, as we know :-), prana follows intention, and the desires of my heart, my soul's work here did reveal itself. Now, the big work is choosing to step into that which is revealed to us.

A benevolent Source supports us in living big. The 1st universal principle of alignment in Anusara Yoga is Open to Grace. This means we step into the flow. We set foundation and we tap into and nourish the Light that lives within us. When we pay attention to and nourish the Light of the One that lives within us we begin the journey of co-creating with the Great One Heart. As the great hip/hop artist Nelly says, "Do you wanna go and take a ride wit me" (yes, I think I am funny :-)), so the One invites us to move into the flow and live Big. Let's Go!

“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate.

Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure.

It is our light not our darkness that most frightens us.

We ask ourselves, who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous,

talented and fabulous?

Actually, who are you not to be?

You are a child of God.

Your playing small does not serve the world.

There’s nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other

people won’t feel insecure around you.

We were born to make manifest the glory of

God that is within us.

It’s not just in some of us; it’s in everyone.

And as we let our own light shine,

we unconsciously give other people

permission to do the same.

As we are liberated from our own fear,

Our presence automatically liberates others.”

—Marianne Williamson

Prana follows attention

2009-11-08T16:07:00.000-08:00

The idea that prana follows where our attention is directed is a profound and powerful yogic teaching. This truth was brought to the forefront of my mind the other day when I was reading Anusara teacher, Christina Sell's fab blog. In it she says, As far as I can tell, all yoga has ever been about is harnessing attention, about managing energy and about consciously choosing what we are going to do with our energy, with our vital force, once we gain access to it.

So, here is the deal: we are all given the power to harness the life force and direct it towards that which we desire to manifest. My teacher, John Friend, says one of the reasons we practice asana is to cultivate a strong vessel (our bodies) to contain more prana.

Think about what happens with the news all the time. Fear sells. We get scared and then we focus our attention on all the bad stuff that could happen and then we are ruled by fear. Often there are people who benefit from our fear, we plug into them so we can stay "safe", to find out more about what we need to do to protect ourselves, what bad stuff is coming.

Now, what if, through becoming intimate friends with ourselves, and by making space for the truest desires of our hearts and souls to show themselves to us, we purposefully focus our energy and attention? Can you imagine? What if this is what all parents taught their children when they began to share their hopes and dreams?

Setting a sankalpa (an intention) is a practice that helps us consciously step into the flow of Life. What, at this time in your life, do you wish to plant and nourish with your attention?

"You are what your deep driving desire is; as your desire is, so is your will." - The Brihadaranyaka Upanishad

Unwavering

2009-11-02T12:48:00.001-08:00

John was speaking to a class this weekend while they were in a balance pose. He told them something one of his teachers, Gurumayi Chidvilasananda, told him. Gurumayi said, "John, to find balance why don't you look within your heart to the place that is unwavering."

I love this. Anusara suggests that within each of us is EVERYTHING. We must look within our own hearts to find what we are looking for. Isn't it amusing how much we get busy, stay crazy with work, etc. and forget the fertile garden that lives within us? Yoga practice is a powerful way to begin to enter the space of the heart. It is my experience that we must also feel deeply, pay attention to these sensations and spend time in quiet meditation in order to truly enter into this space.

What if every human being spent a few moments every day bowing inward to the altar of their own heart? What if each of us, YOU AND ME, made it our top priority to have a relationship with the unwavering space in our hearts?

On the scale of yogis throughout time I am a baby beginner yogi and meditator. And still, the small bit that I have spent time listening, really listening to my heart has brought amazing results. Not only am I generally more satisfied with my life, but life seems to offer itself with such beauty and delight to me. It doesn't mean that I don't have painful feelings and experiences, it doesn't mean that I don't get angry and say stuff that I regret. It does mean that all those things are lessening because I am more conscious of them, and I am willing to step into the feeling so that I can find a new way and continue to heal and grow. Mostly, and this is the part I always doubted, it does mean that the true desires of my heart are coming and have come to me. I do have to be willing to take risks, but I find that if my attention is directed to this "still, small voice" within my own heart all comes.

Transfromation-the offerings of Winter Solstice-And John Friend in New Orleans!

2009-10-31T08:59:00.000-07:00

I am beginning this blog in New Orleans. My friend, Rachel, and I have traveled here to see John Friend. Last night John gave a dharma talk on the origins of Halloween in the Celtic tradition of Samhain.

This time of the year is auspicious as it is the junction place between Autumn Equinox, when night and day are equal lengths, and Winter Solstice, when the dark becomes prevalent. During this time we acknowledge what has been-the bountiful harvest of all that has come to us in the light-and we begin to plant seeds of intention for the germination time in the dark. For it is in the dark that all that is born is created.

Before I continue about this beautiful and powerful holiday, I would like to interject my own relation to this particular time. Recently I have been grieving and celebrating a death of a part of myself. A challenging situation presented itself and through this situation I saw a part of myself that reacts to situations that seem scary or threatening in a way that is no longer of service to me. There was a time when it did serve me, but now it only blocks me from the Flow and my ability to share in Love and intimacy with others as deeply as I desire. When I get into this old reaction habit I forget my own intrinsic worth, I forget that I am being supported by Source no matter what, and I forget my own power.

It was really painful to see this part of myself so clearly revealed, and yet, it was also a profound and joyous revelation. I got that I would truly be okay no matter what happened. I came to a new knowledge of my own goodness and value. I feel this new delight in me. A trust appeared from deep within my own heart that I have not known before. Even in the anger and grief that I was feeling I knew that all there was for me to do was act with integrity and hold tightly to the glowing mid line of my own heart. And truly, the Great Heart, would continue to support me. AMAZING! Grace is what we are guaranteed.

So, back to John. I am going to hi-lite a few points he made that were particularly meaningful to me:

-The dark has been given a negative connotation. A duality of light=good/dark=bad
In the way of the tantra dark is of the One too. This world that we live in is one of contrast all pulsing from the same Auspicious Source of goodness and beneficence. In fact, it is the dark, that transformation occurs. Think of a yoga class where you are stretching and working in a way that actually breaks down tissue. Then, at night when you are asleep, the reconstruction, the rebuilding, occurs. Isn't that wonderful!

I will end with this:
John said,

We can look back and bathe our hearts in gratitude for all that this past year has presented us with-the challenges, the insights I have gained, the revelation that has come to me. Then, I consciously plants the seeds for this time of darkness. What is it that we see for our lives in the coming year? What do we wish for our families, our partners, our friends.

In the black, when you close your eyes, there is a vast, open space. You can paint your vision for the future. This is true magic.